Wants vs Needs
This topic has come up a lot in the past few years. Through book clubs, bible studies, women’s groups and inside my head. What are my needs and what are my wants. It is so easy to proclaim what my wants are. I could give you a list, but I wont. But my needs – those are harder to differentiate. I want things that I need, but I usually don’t need the things I want.
In dealing with my wantonness of food, I know I need food to survive – and it needs to be the right foods. But then there are those foods I want just because I want them. Like Cheetos! Well, not anymore at least. But I have moments where I am ready to break something for this WANT inside of me, but I physically don’t need it. Mentally… maybe, but I think thats really just my denied addiction talking.
With that being said – I had a break through it seems yesterday. I was at a coffee meeting with other members of Ncompass and I left for a minute to use the ladies room. And where all good thinking happens, I had a really great thought. I said to myself “Wow! Look at what you are doing with your life. You are truly surrounding yourself today with what matters most. You are making use of the oxygen in your lungs to do great things for Jesus, for yourself, for your family, and the world you live in. And today, you didn’t give too much thought toward what you really desired for dinner. You made something that tasted good, was good for you, but rather than spending many hours dreaming and pinning over a meal, you got on with your day. ” (it reminded me of times where you break up with old boy friends and you finally get to the day where you didn’t think about him at all that day. Not a thought crossed your mind, other than the thought about not thinking about him. It was freeing actually!)
When I walked out of the Thinking Room, I realized I had made it through my first day surrounding myself with what matters most. Now I know there will be days in the future where I will think about and dream about dinner. I enjoy cooking and eating, and there really isn’t anything wrong with that. But in terms of the relationship break-up; I need to start treating food like a break-up where we are still friends. Its going to take some time apart for healing to happen. And time will come where we can be friends again. But I can’t call Food anymore like I used to. I can’t pick it up at 11:30 at night when I need a good cry. I can’t depend on it for anything other than friendship. We are not intimate anymore. Food and I are just friends. Food matters, it just doesn’t matter MOST!